THE GIVING OF THANKS 
This week at home has been wonderful. It took me three months of living in a decades-old, moldy apartment to become desperately homesick for simply a clean floor and a clean bathroom. But once I arrived, I realized that there was so much more. Apart from being able to see Boyfriend & other friends and having the freedom to actually drive places, my family is at home
[although my dad is in Germany right now on business].
Most things around here change slowly. For example, I still have a de facto 11PM curfew, which is kind of ridiculous but my mom can be a terrifying dictator when she wants to be. But the road by my house is finally complete after months and months of construction, my dad bought a new wireless router so we don't have to reset the connection every 20 minutes, and my brother is growing up.
Larry and I are close; not in the way of telling each other all of our secrets, but we've been through a lot together and so we understand each other, although I probably understand him a little better than the other way around since I've already been through puberty and middle school.
Anyhow, I've always been worried about him and leaving for college didn't really reduce my concern, though admittedly I have gone for days without thinking about my family
[it happens]. My mom has never been a very patient woman and Larry is a stuck-up brat 50% of the time, so I imagined them pretty much ripping each other apart at home, especially without my dad around to keep the peace.
But things seem to be okay. I realized that life moves on while I'm away. Larry has gotten taller, his hair got longer
[I had to do an emergency trim the night I got back], and I can tell that he's slowly maturing even though he's entered that pubescent phase where his parents are the un-coolest people on Earth and he refuses to go out to eat with my mom because he just doesn't want to
talk to her
[that's my conjecture at least]. For example, he listens to me when I'm talking, and I don't mean just when I'm asking him to do a favor but also if he asked me a question; he's curious about the world. He hangs out with his friends instead of playing CS all day, and although I'm sure that his buddies are not a very good influence on him, I'm also sure that Larry's smart enough not to do drugs or whatever illicit activities boys do at that age these days.
In contrast, he has also entered the phase of needing to fit in. I noticed it tonight at the combined youth group/college Thanksgiving potluck for my church: the youngest
[8th grade/freshmen] boys were wearing their large zip-up hoodies and shaggy hair while the youngest girls sported hoodies with the interior lined with fur and the homogeneity of it all reminded me of my own years filled with insecurity and the longing not to stick out too much among my peers.
And as much as Larry denies it, I know that his insistence on transforming into a skaterkid is something that he'll grow out of
[after all, Boyfriend went through pretty much the same thing], and hopefully he'll realize that label-whoring does not make him more substantial of a person even though all his little
friends dress the same way. My mom bought him two shirts today from either Pac-Sun or Zumiez and although they were size small they almost went down to his knees, but he was still so proud of his clothes as he modeled his shirt for me and said, "Look at my first skater shirt!" as if that was enough to make him better at something, as if all the teens that wear Hollister automatically become surfers once they put on the logo. I just hope he learns before wasting too much of my parents' money, because skater-brand stuff is hella expensive.
All this leads to my final point about my brother, whom I love more than anybody else in the world. I am so thankful for him. Having a younger brother taught me to be responsible, loving and patient. He keeps me from being too lonely when I'm at home or at somebody else's home. I am thankful for what God is doing in Larry's life; I'm slowly learning that even when I can't be there to direct him in what is right and wrong, God is still present and sovereign in his life. I thank God for blessing me with a brother who is more than just the ridiculous two-dimensional caricature he displays to other people to get attention; he's capable of being sensitive in small ways as well.
I'm leaving Chicago in 8 hours and I won't see my baby brother for three weeks, but I know he'll be alright.
{!}
Comments (2)
:) I love it, Laura--the picture, the post and you.
I didn't go home because my mom and sister came here. My mom's brother and his family live in the suburbs around here, so we spent the holiday with their family and an extra Taiwanese grad-school cousin. I miss you guys though.
osiris makes pretty cool skater shoes. pricey, but cool.