BRAIN EXPLOSION 
I've read a lot of
weird stuff online, but this one really threatened to make my brain dissolve and leak out of my ears and nose. It's something called
Christian Domestic Discipline. When I first saw the link on some web column, I thought it was related to the discipline of children. Interested to see what it had to say, I clicked and was greeted with, "This website contains themes pertaining to spanking and may be suitable only for adults." That made me think that it was about S&M.
Hey, Christian couples can be kinky too, I thought,
so why not see what it says? [Don't judge me based on my reading choices please...they're unconventional, I know, but I'm just trying to learn about the world.]To my utter surprise, I discovered that this website is actually about physical discipline between a
[Christian] husband and wife, namely the husband punishing the wife:
"In CDD, the husband has authority to spank the wife.
The wife does not have authority to spank her husband.
In all my perusals of literature pertaining to the topic of feminine submission in Christian marriages, I had never heard of such a thing before. Their Biblical support basically goes thus [all taken word-for-word]:
"1. God tells wives to submit to their husbands.
2. Biblically, giving physical discipline and the pain involved is NOT seen as abusive, but is actually commended and pointed to as a very wise thing to do. LACK of giving pain can in fact be abusive in some cases, Biblically. Let’s look at this a bit. In the Bible, spanking a CHILD is not abusive.
3. God called Israel his WIFE in the Old Testament. And spoke of physically disciplining her (by the armies of her enemies, drought, and so forth). Why would God paint the picture of being an abusive husband in an attempt to convince them to LOVE Him??
I would agree that all three of those points can be found in the Bible, and although spanking is not the logical conclusion to come to in my mind, I can see how it can be a convincing argument. Still, this is one of the most disturbing "Christian" practices that I have encountered in my life.
Here are some other gems from the website
[bolded emphasis mine]:
"This leads to physical discipline to lovingly keep the wife accountable to her master’s God given authority. After these marriage relationships have been living with the husband as head and the wife in subjection to his authority, the wife always desires greatly to have this type of relationship with her husband, feeling that the husband is showing practical love when he corrects her with physical and painful discipline for sinful habits or other various things. She wants to be in subjection and so obeying means allowing discipline in any way her master/husband determines is necessary.
No matter how I try to picture it, I can't be comfortable with the image of a husband spanking a wife as a controlled type of "discipline". My first reaction is to roll my eyes, because I can't take it seriously.
Really? Adults spanking each other as if one was a small child? Give me a break. I would die laughing if somebody attempted that on me. When I try to sober my thoughts, I can only see it as twisted and primitive. What kind of behavior can't be talked out between adults and instead merits physical punishment? Well here's an example:
"Most marriages waste much more time COPING with a wife’s problem areas than a DD [Domestic Discipline] marriage spends CORRECTING it. A DD wife may spend a short time learning not to gossip and backbite, and be ok after that. A non-DD wife may spend all her life destroying relationships. And her husband wastes decades trying to cope with what he should have used his authority to help her overcome.
Okay. Here is the scenario that painted in my head:
Wife: And when I was at the mall this afternoon, I saw Marie holding hands with an attractive man who was definitely NOT her husband. I asked Eileen if she knew anything about this when I ran into her later and she had absolutely no idea.
Husband: Didn't I tell you that gossip is destructive and unholy? Yet you're still doing it?
W: I was just curious...
H: How many times have I talked to you about this problem? What is it going to take for you to learn to stop?
W: I'm trying, really...
H: I don't think you are. More severe measures need to be taken.
W: You're not...oh, no...not that...
H: Prepare to be spanked, woman!
W: *boohoohoo*
Creepy or LOL-worthy? Here's what
CDD had to say to the wife:
"There will be commands to prepare to be spanked. Respect his leadership. If you strongly disagree with him and don’t believe you should be spanked, then tell him with a submitted attitude. But even if you disagree, you are still under authority and must before God go and prepare for discipline. He has the authority by God to discipline you – it is between him and God whether he is doing it for the right things or not. (He could be wrong, true, but you could be as well.)
These are some of the supposed benefits of this kind of marriage:
"1) Obedience to God. If a man really is the head, then it is sinful for him NOT to find and use God’s methods of wielding authority properly. How could we use MAN’S methods in order to properly carry the weight of responsibility God gave a man to carry?
Wow. So it can actually be sinful if the husband does
not participate in spanking? Hmmm scary.
This one just confuses me:
"3) Protection of the wife physically – Remember, Jesus the head of the church DIED for the church, and He also washes her by the water of the word. A wise husband is to "understand" his wife and live wisely with her. Authority over her means responsibility to protect and love her.
Physical punishment is physical protection? Also, I believe that Jesus never physically disciplined anyone. So what up with the random reference?
This one resonates with me even less:
"5) Children might grow up with the example of a father who loves the mother and of a mother who respects the father. And instead of merely fights and power plays and manipulation, they may see more peace as the wife lets go of trying to fight the husband and learns to peacefully submit and become a vibrant woman instead of the passivity found in most marriages.
I'm
pretty sure that if I ever saw or heard of my father spanking my mother as discipline, I would thoroughly die of shock and bewilderment. I cannot see it relating to any of the above words such as "peace" and "vibrant woman".
I would venture to say that being spanked is pretty damn humiliating. I understand the reasons why some might believe it to be an edifying practice, but at the same time, I am deeply perturbed by the idea of a husband resorting to physically punishing his wife. I wonder how many Christians actually subscribe to this way of thinking?
{!}
Comments (2)
that scenario of the husband spanking the wife is ridiculous haha
i just love reading your xanga ..it's very ...very.interesting
weezer of course. american football has guys spanking guys. I know some girls who could use a spanking.